Pamela Spencer's Profile | Pamela Spencer's Blogs | Pamela Spencer's Pics

I am a 28-year-old Kansas City transplant from Michigan. I am in no way a dating expert. In fact, I often have a love-hate relationship with dating. But when it comes to talking about dating, it's all love.

July 2009
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Archives

2009 (114)
- July (2)
  - 3rd: What no one talks about - 7:55 am
  - 1st: Tired of waiting - 1:30 am
- June (14)
  - 29th: Wet and wild dating - 8:00 am
  - 25th: Weekend Date Idea: It's in the hole - 10:15 am
  - 22nd: What's the best bar to meet someone? - 3:05 pm
  - 21st: Blinding me with science - 7:25 pm
  - 19th: What about your friends - 12:25 am
  - 18th: Weekend date idea: Do you like to watch? - 2:35 am
  - 17th: Hottest and naughtiest bachelors - 6:00 pm
  - 15th: Why you should like dating - 11:25 pm
  - 11th: Staying positive on KC's dating scene - 12:25 pm
  - 9th: Weekend date idea: Eat something - 5:15 pm
  - 7th: DJ Jazzy Jeff and the P&L - 4:50 pm
  - 4th: You ain't no holla back girl - 2:20 am
  - 3rd: Weekend date ideas: Party, party, party - 8:20 am
  - 1st: What isn't on Craigslist? - 12:55 am
- May (18)
  - 29th: It's a shame - 9:10 am
  - 27th: Weekend date ideas: Get your culture fix - 8:35 am
  - 25th: Healing heart trumps a cheating heart - 12:55 pm
  - 22nd: The big payback - 8:05 am
  - 21st: Beer vs. wine - 8:50 am
  - 20th: Weekend Date Ideas: Fire and water - 11:40 pm
  - 18th: No strings attatched - 5:40 pm
  - 15th: "Just friends" - 8:00 am
  - 14th: Twitter dating - 8:50 am
  - 13th: Single in the Spotlight: Matt O'Barr - 8:50 am
  - 12th: Weekend date idea No. 1 - 8:15 am
  - 11th: Friend stealers - 9:15 am
  - 8th: There's no piece of tail worth this - 8:45 am
  - 7th: Tips for daters? - 8:45 am
  - 6th: If you need someone to talk to - 8:40 am
  - 5th: The science of dating - 8:05 am
  - 4th: We'll have to wait on that strip Twister - 9:20 am
  - 1st: Sexy advice - 9:05 am
- April (20)
  - 30th: Wanna play? - 8:50 am
  - 29th: Do opposites attract? - 8:20 am
  - 28th: Race and online dating - 8:40 am
  - 27th: Let's just cuddle - 7:55 am
  - 23rd: Things are about to heat up - 10:10 am
  - 22nd: You didn't plan this, did you? - 8:25 am
  - 21st: Video speed dating - 8:50 am
  - 20th: Fast love - 12:40 am
  - 18th: Feeling sexy - 1:50 am
  - 17th: 101 ways to get noticed - 7:25 am
  - 16th: KC's longest happy hours - 9:35 am
  - 15th: A text message for all - 8:50 am
  - 13th: Cheap and easy - 9:30 am
  - 13th: If you got down and dirty ... - 8:50 am
  - 10th: Tell me your worst breakup stories - 9:05 am
  - 9th: This is why dating stinks - 9:30 am
  - 8th: Stuck in a rut or bringing the ruckus? - 6:05 am
  - 6th: Is dating harder when you're smart? - 1:35 pm
  - 2nd: Calling all artists - 11:05 am
  - 1st: Cheap and easy - 8:35 am
- March (20)
  - 31st: Playing some D - 8:25 am
  - 30th: Dating by mobile phone - 9:00 am
  - 27th: Get served -- like Kansas is going to - 1:15 pm
  - 26th: Who's your favorite nerd? - 9:05 am
  - 25th: Love and comics - 10:40 am
  - 24th: Boy crazy - 9:00 am
  - 20th: Did you plan this? - 8:45 am
  - 19th: Go Down Together - 9:30 am
  - 18th: Sex is not a crime - 2:05 am
  - 16th: Girls, girls, girls - 2:00 am
  - 13th: Eharmony's gay dating site to launch - 7:55 am
  - 12th: Obama loves women, too - 2:40 am
  - 11th: Dating in KC is ... - 8:15 am
  - 10th: What matters to you? - 8:45 am
  - 8th: I love women - 8:20 am
  - 6th: Is first love overrated? - 9:20 am
  - 5th: Not-so-sexy movie and rope climbers - 7:55 am
  - 4th: Love times two and sex and you - 9:00 am
  - 3rd: Day of Caring - 9:45 am
  - 2nd: The recession and your love life - 2:10 am
- February (18)
  - 27th: Love sexy movies? - 11:15 am
  - 25th: Cheap eating dates - 6:10 am
  - 24th: Not giving it up - 9:00 am
  - 23rd: Finding love on facebook - 8:10 am
  - 18th: The appeal of jerks - 8:00 am
  - 18th: Bristol Palin on teen moms, her mom and sex - 2:05 am
  - 17th: Are you in a bad relationship? - 9:00 am
  - 16th: Getting busy on the Web - 7:00 am
  - 13th: Food, sex and the economy - 9:00 am
  - 12th: ... And still hating - 8:35 am
  - 11th: For all major haters -- something else to do Feb. 14 - 8:10 am
  - 10th: Love in the 'burbs - 7:55 am
  - 8th: Romantic eats - 8:05 am
  - 6th: SHE's just not that into you - 9:30 am
  - 5th: Heavy petting - 9:05 am
  - 4th: Did this book change your life? - 7:25 am
  - 3rd: Competing couples - 6:15 am
  - 2nd: You're a bad kisser and ... - 8:40 am
- January (22)
  - 29th: Don't underestimate the power of a good bra - 10:35 am
  - 28th: Love in this club - 8:40 am
  - 27th: Finding love in the '09 - 8:20 am
  - 26th: Off the hook lovin' - 8:30 am
  - 23rd: After the wedding - 8:50 am
  - 22nd: Get married minus the crazy - 8:35 am
  - 21st: Chasing your tail - 8:25 am
  - 20th: Older dating - 9:00 am
  - 19th: Valentine's Day: Love it or hate it? - 8:00 am
  - 16th: Be the rock - 8:45 am
  - 15th: Free dating, pricey girl - 8:40 am
  - 14th: Get tested - 9:20 am
  - 13th: Adult toy story - 9:00 am
  - 12th: The sexes and the bars - 9:05 am
  - 9th: Guest Blog: How far do I have to go to find love? - 8:40 am
  - 8th: Solo vacations - 9:45 am
  - 8th: Porn industry stimulus package - 8:10 am
  - 7th: Dipping your pen - 8:45 am
  - 6th: More dating resolutions - 8:00 am
  - 5th: Her mission for 2009: Get married - 9:05 am
  - 2nd: Any room for me in those genes? - 9:15 am
  - 1st: Older man, younger woman - 9:30 am
2008 (202)
- December (24)
  - 31st: Tips for tonight - 9:40 am
  - 30th: Get dirty Thursday - 9:15 am
  - 29th: You can tell from how he eats ... - 9:50 am
  - 26th: Little blue pills - 9:00 am
  - 25th: Ways to avoid Christmas - 8:00 am
  - 24th: Start the year off with a bang - 9:15 am
  - 23rd: Dating isn't dead - 9:05 am
  - 22nd: Requirements: Smart, funny, has 401(k) - 9:45 am
  - 19th: Singles in the spotlight - 10:00 am
  - 19th: It's all you, baby - 9:50 am
  - 18th: Really, being single is way cooler - 9:30 am
  - 17th: Green with envy this Christmas? - 9:45 am
  - 16th: Have sex or surf the net? - 9:10 am
  - 15th: It's like "Survivor" for relationships - 9:50 am
  - 12th: What do the lonely do at Christmas? - 8:10 am
  - 11th: The dangers of kissing. No, really - 9:50 am
  - 10th: She used to be my homeboy's lady - 10:10 am
  - 9th: Shop Fair Trade, help the YWCA - 9:10 am
  - 8th: The couple that swings together - 9:35 am
  - 5th: Single in the city? - 9:35 am
  - 4th: Hey, master daters - 1:40 am
  - 3rd: How to be a player - 9:30 am
  - 2nd: I can dream about you - 9:05 am
  - 1st: Pick me up, put me down - 9:55 am
- November (19)
  - 28th: Guest blog: Mr. Right Now is holding me hostage - 9:15 am
  - 27th: Can I get over this? - 9:00 am
  - 26th: Welcome to hell. Population: You - 8:05 am
  - 25th: Holiday headaches - 7:20 am
  - 24th: The dating crutch - 9:25 am
  - 21st: Want women want - 9:25 am
  - 20th: Let it go, already - 9:40 am
  - 19th: Where do I meet people? - 9:45 am
  - 18th: Hold the puke - 9:15 am
  - 15th: Married cheating is not new - 11:20 pm
  - 14th: A lady in the street ... - 9:50 am
  - 13th: Let's talk about sex ... among other things - 7:20 am
  - 12th: Angel in a centerfold - 9:00 am
  - 10th: And now ... FaceMyDrama - 9:15 am
  - 7th: Get a clue, get a date - 9:35 am
  - 6th: Close the deal already - 9:45 am
  - 5th: First date don'ts - 11:40 am
  - 4th: You voted Libertarian? This will never work - 9:40 am
  - 3rd: Big date, little money - 9:35 am
- October (23)
  - 31st: Put a ring on it - 9:25 am
  - 31st: Dating the undead - 1:40 am
  - 30th: The things you learn on TV - 9:45 am
  - 29th: A sordid past - 9:05 am
  - 28th: College kids and the deed - 11:05 am
  - 27th: Thinking about online dating? - 9:45 am
  - 24th: No sex = $10,000 wedding - 9:35 am
  - 23rd: I don't know about you ... - 9:40 am
  - 22nd: My adventures in dating - 9:40 am
  - 21st: Guys, do you know what girls want? - 10:05 am
  - 20th: You did what on a first date? - 9:00 am
  - 17th: Out of my league - 9:20 am
  - 16th: Nap or nookie? - 9:25 am
  - 15th: Guest Blog: Are you high? - 9:10 am
  - 14th: OK, this is the last time I talk sex - 10:20 am
  - 13th: Love and lambchops - 10:45 am
  - 10th: Can I get a table dance? - 9:10 am
  - 9th: Guest blog: To co-habitate or no? - 9:35 am
  - 7th: Suddenly single? - 9:35 am
  - 6th: Soccer, lovers and girls in bikinis - 9:45 am
  - 3rd: Dating and texting - 10:30 am
  - 2nd: Don't go on a date if ... - 11:30 am
  - 1st: Wedding belles - 9:25 am
- September (22)
  - 30th: Guest blog: Name this sex act - 9:45 am
  - 29th: The God of the hook-ups - 9:55 am
  - 24th: Like Pam and Tommy Lee's sex tape ... - 9:55 am
  - 23rd: Umm ... you suck in the sack - 8:00 am
  - 22nd: How not to be psycho - 11:15 am
  - 19th: Talk is cheap - 12:05 am
  - 18th: Do you need flirting lessons? - 10:40 am
  - 17th: Words from the wise - 9:35 am
  - 16th: Playing into male fantasies - 2:20 pm
  - 15th: Betrayals - 10:35 am
  - 15th: What's the worst way you've been blown off - 10:00 am
  - 12th: Did Ink get you laid? - 10:50 am
  - 11th: Guys, would you get snipped? - 9:20 am
  - 10th: Speaking of self pleasure - 9:10 am
  - 10th: Marrying the wrong man - 9:00 am
  - 9th: Sex on the first date - 8:05 am
  - 8th: The weekend fling - 10:30 am
  - 5th: Bringing home the bacon - 11:20 am
  - 4th: More from the "that's not hot" files - 9:50 am
  - 3rd: My services are free - 3:05 pm
  - 2nd: Moms and sex - 9:05 am
  - 1st: Bad in bed - 9:40 am
- August (22)
  - 29th: Sex addiction? I'm not buying it - 11:15 am
  - 28th: Flair for your package? - 3:40 pm
  - 27th: Church hookups - 10:10 am
  - 26th: Why was I dissed? - 9:40 am
  - 25th: What is cheating? - 9:30 am
  - 22nd: Spray-on condoms? Really? - 9:00 am
  - 21st: The condom song - 9:15 am
  - 20th: Did we have sex last night? - 9:10 am
  - 19th: Like a virgin - 10:10 am
  - 18th: Spider-Man has his curse, I have mine - 9:20 am
  - 15th: Guest blog: Labor of long-distance love - 10:00 am
  - 14th: No need to knock the cobwebs off ... - 10:30 am
  - 13th: Dating tips, as promised - 11:05 am
  - 12th: This site is killing the game - 9:00 am
  - 11th: Guest blog: Newly Defined Soul Mates - 9:55 am
  - 8th: Rude breakup behavior - 10:05 am
  - 7th: The sexiest movie you've ever seen - 10:55 am
  - 6th: Hot for teacher - 11:25 am
  - 5th: Speaking of sex - 4:20 pm
  - 4th: Y'all are weak - 4:45 pm
  - 2nd: Guest Blog: On loving her best friend - 9:20 am
  - 1st: Guest blog: The online dating adventure continues - 12:05 pm
- July (24)
  - 31st: Secret lovers - 10:40 am
  - 30th: Doing it big in relationships - 9:05 am
  - 29th: Breakup rituals - 9:25 am
  - 28th: Try these condoms on for size - 11:15 am
  - 26th: Being "The Bachelor" - 2:35 pm
  - 25th: Guest blog: An online dating adventure begins - 9:35 am
  - 24th: Want to be wanted? Make yourself scarce - 9:15 am
  - 23rd: When bad timing happens to good people - 7:10 am
  - 22nd: I won't do THAT - 9:00 am
  - 21st: Seniors take to online dating - 9:15 am
  - 18th: Bad kissers and how to stop them - 6:45 am
  - 17th: Guest blog: Focused on the wrong girl - 8:10 am
  - 16th: Women arrested in oral competition - 11:00 am
  - 15th: How far would you drive for love? - 7:40 am
  - 14th: Backups for the bedroom - 6:40 am
  - 11th: Your timing sucks - 6:50 am
  - 10th: Guest Blog: Man eBay - 6:00 am
  - 9th: Confessions of a serial monogamist - 10:20 am
  - 8th: Guest blog: Tell The Truth ... - 1:10 am
  - 7th: Do you online stalk? - 7:30 am
  - 4th: Make some fireworks - 2:35 am
  - 3rd: Shut up and kiss me - 1:35 am
  - 2nd: Once it hits your lips, it's so good - 3:40 am
  - 1st: Be loud ladies, monkey men like it. - 5:15 am
- June (16)
  - 30th: A pimp or a loser? - 12:40 pm
  - 30th: Four girls, a keg and a big idea - 7:50 am
  - 27th: Guest blog: Oneitus - 8:00 am
  - 26th: Guest blog: Whatever happened to dating? - 8:00 am
  - 25th: "in case we had sex I didnt want to remember" - 9:35 am
  - 25th: Young people doin' the nasty - 8:00 am
  - 23rd: Old people doin' the nasty - 9:00 am
  - 13th: Taking three men at a time - 1:05 pm
  - 12th: I regulate every shade of that ... - 2:25 pm
  - 12th: SiKC - 11:40 am
  - 12th: Coming up for air - 10:00 am
  - 11th: Is it art or is it porn? - 12:30 pm
  - 11th: "What makes a date movie?" - 6:25 am
  - 9th: Sex: how much is enough? - 4:30 pm
  - 5th: "Looking for girls in all the wrong places" - 3:05 pm
  - 4th: More places to find dates - 9:20 pm
- May (5)
  - 22nd: Steamy summer spots - 1:50 pm
  - 19th: "My ex-girlfriend loved Celine Dion" - 12:05 pm
  - 19th: Buying condoms and the walk of shame - 7:30 am
  - 14th: Personal massager? - 12:20 pm
  - 11th: Date at your own risk - 6:30 pm
- April (46)
  - 29th: Are you a woman under 26? - 11:30 am
  - 28th: Cheater, cheater pumkin eater - 11:55 am
  - 25th: Mood music - 10:10 am
  - 25th: Candles. Cheesedick or romantic? - 9:35 am
  - 24th: What boys are teaching me - 3:00 pm
  - 22nd: The best policy - 2:10 am
  - 21st: Don't sweat the haters - 10:15 pm
  - 21st: Breakup sex, the saga continues - 12:15 pm
  - 18th: Under the skin - 11:45 pm
  - 18th: Dating hasn't changed much - 11:35 pm
  - 18th: That's f'ing rude - 10:00 pm
  - 18th: "We-jaculation" - 9:55 pm
  - 18th: Jerk Island - 3:35 pm
  - 18th: When did you get married? - 12:55 pm
  - 18th: That ain't sexy - 11:20 am
  - 18th: Single girl army - 9:10 am
  - 18th: Getting the digits - 12:15 am
  - 17th: Magic number - 10:30 pm
  - 17th: Mr. "I just wanna get married" - 9:20 pm
  - 17th: Yes, he'd hit that - 9:15 pm
  - 17th: You can quote me - 7:35 pm
  - 17th: You slept with that? - 6:30 pm
  - 17th: Woman power - 2:10 pm
  - 17th: Look at that body - 12:25 pm
  - 17th: Duped by a dork - 10:00 am
  - 17th: It's always something - 12:15 am
  - 16th: Talk sexy to me - 10:55 pm
  - 16th: What's in your boxers? - 9:55 pm
  - 16th: This one's for you, married people - 9:35 pm
  - 16th: Personality types - 8:25 pm
  - 16th: Dating technology - 6:20 pm
  - 16th: First dates - 12:05 pm
  - 15th: Going it alone - 9:25 pm
  - 15th: Sex and the single mom - 4:05 pm
  - 15th: Boyfriend material vs. bedroom material - 2:30 am
  - 14th: Was your prom this dramatic? - 8:35 pm
  - 14th: Living single - 8:30 pm
  - 14th: Well, we still have "hot hate sex" - 6:05 pm
  - 14th: just to clarify - 5:35 pm
  - 14th: Stop with the Va-jay-jay - 1:15 am
  - 13th: You've thought about it ... - 2:10 am
  - 12th: Quit hating on online dating - 5:40 pm
  - 12th: Breakup sex: The beginning - 2:35 am
  - 11th: SINGLES OUT -- a story from 2005 - 2:10 am
  - 3rd: 'Good sex lasts 3 to 13 minutes' - 9:25 am
  - 1st: This week's tip: Leave the panties on - 11:40 am
- March (1)
  - 31st: Last chance for FREE stuff! - 5:25 pm

Let it go, already

Know anyone who just can't let stuff go? (Raises hand). I have to admit, I try so hard. But if a guy makes one little phrase I don't like, sometimes I'm still holding on to it a three months, six months, a year later.

Such a female stereotype. I hate being that way. Some little things men say, I've forgiven, but not forgotten. Like "I want to date you, but I don't want a girlfriend" I got in a huff about and we stopped even dating. Once a guy called me high maintenance. One of my girls said "He called you high maintenance? You should break up with him! My jerk ex-boyfriend called me high maintenance." That one, I let go, because I'm not high maintenance. Neurotic, maybe. High maintenance? No. But nice to know I'm not the only person who remembers the little things.

The other day, when I brought up something Novio said in July, he said "Gotta watch what I say around you." Which made me feel bad. I don't him to feel stifled. But I also don't like to be pissed off.

The answer: Men should just stop talking.

Just kidding. Here are tips from a guy on how to win and avoid fights.

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Posted on: Nov 20 2008 - 09:40:00 AM

Tags: DATING FIGHTS

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