Ink

Melissa Braverman is on a quest. Or should I say blitz? As in The Great Dating Blitz.

The New York City blogger is going to eight cities to see what dating is like in other ZIP codes for her blog, Single Gal in the City, and an eventual book.

She’s been to Cleveland and Atlanta. Her next stop? KC. The 36-year-old also plans to visit Houston, Denver, Portland, Ore., and Los Angeles. Her last stop will be decided by popular demand vote online.

She picked the cities based on Forbes 2009 list of Best Cities for Singles. She went for a combo of the top cities and cities she’d been to before. New York was No. 1. Kansas City was No. 37.

So how did we end up on her list? Her best friend lives here, so she’s been visiting for 20 years, but she’s never explored the city from a single’s perspective.

Now she’s out to find out the quirks of being single in KC. On her agenda the week of March 14 are a barbecue date (somehow in all her visits, she’s never had it), a Bon Jovi concert, a happy hour on the Plaza (you’re invited) and, of course, the St. Patrick’s Day Parade (I told her she couldn’t miss that one).

The inspiration

Braverman got the idea for her dating blitz around December when she was feeling a little disenchanted with the dating scene in New York.

She had been dating a guy, thinking things were going well, and then he went MIA for a week.

“I found myself thinking that wow, is this is what the dating landscape has come to that you can really hit it off with someone and they can disappear,” she said.

She said she loves New York, but the frenetic pace of it is exactly what makes it a hard place to find a quality relationship. People are focused on careers rather than settling down, she said.

That’s what made her start thinking about what dating’s like in other places. So she quit her job in PR and decided to embark on her adventure.

The journey

And so, the journey began. She’s found in both Cleveland and Atlanta that people tend to settle down earlier. I told her to expect the same in KC.

There are some aspects of dating though, that aren’t specific to ZIP codes, she said. There’s ambiguity about what exactly a guy’s agenda is and texting has led to the death of romance in a lot of ways.

The thing that’s different, she said, is that in New York you can casually date lots of people and not worry about them seeing you out. She said Cleveland has a big small town feel (sound familiar, KC?), so that’s not the case.

Her best date so far? An impromptu date with a guy she met at a happy hour in Cleveland. They went to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum and had a good time talking about life and love. Hmm. Sounds promising.

But has she met any keepers so far?

“Absolutely.” But she’s keeping mum on the details.

Gotta wait for the book.

The destination

Braverman said she is looking for a long-term relationship. Whether she’ll find that in her dating blitz remains to be seen, and that’s fine with her.

“But if it were to fall in my lap, I would be delighted.”

Whether you live in KC or NYC, she said, take advantage of where you live and what you have. She encourages singles to round up single friends (hopefully, you have some left), go to new places and put yourself out there.

“Romantic fulfillment doesn’t happen if you’re just kind of sitting around waiting for it to knock on your door,” she said.

I support this message. They said you find love when you’re not looking, but I say the perfect mate is not going to be found when you’re at home on your couch.

And remember there are plenty of people out there hoping for dating success. Don’t give up and don't settle.

“At the end of the day, when it comes to being single, everyone wants to feel like they’re not in the trenches alone,” Braverman said.

“Whether you’re searching for someone special or not, it’s all about the adventure and making the most of the ride.”

MEET SINGLE GAL NYC

What: A happy hour to Meet Braverman and share dating stories
Who: Anyone who’s experienced dating in KC--whether you’re in a relationship or not
When: 5:30-7:30 p.m. Thursday, March 18
Where: The Oak Room at the Intercontinental Kansas City on the Plaza, 401 Ward Parkway
Info: facebook.com/event.php?eid=344481444620
Blog: singlegalnyc.com 

 
Got a dating or relationship question for Kiss & Tell? E-mail us at inkkcdating@gmail.com or ask away anonymously (we’re not trying to ruin your game, after all) at www.formspring.me/inkkcdating.